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About Gavin W Sisk

I am a photographer, artist, writer, tinkerer, baker, dad, and much more. I enjoy measuring things, and I’m easily distracted. When I should be in the garden pulling weeds, I might slip away to my little shop where I’ll clean my calipers and wonder how to use a frequency counter to write a poem. I can name a few of the things that make me smile. Otherwise, I don't recall what truly is my favorite movie, book, or scotch. I also don’t remember which charms lead me to fall in love. These things may all be forgotten, but they are not lost. I know and enjoy them when they visit. I appreciate that life isn’t fair, though I don’t enjoy it. It seems especially unfair that we should have to work so hard for so long, and risk so much, before we can come to accept this fact. I blame it all on opposable thumbs and our ability to measure things.

The End of Osama Bin Laden: It’s Never the End

Osama Bin Laden is finally dead,
one cheap bullet to the head.
What it really cost is what I dread.

We want to feel good about something.  At the same time, feeling good might not really feel so good.  These muscled issues have pushed against our collective moral fiber for a decade (or longer).  We can’t agree on the nature of these forces, but we will share the catharsis of this apparent resolution.  Yes, it feels good–we’re stuck with that for now.  Let’s have a Bud and wave our flag.  But tomorrow, let’s have coffee and make plans to patch the holes we’ve put in that flag.  It’s life we should be celebrating, not death.

June 26, 2011

Where Do Ideas Come From?

I spent years trying to invent interesting things to write about.  I gave up.  It’s a good thing I know how to use a camera.  And anyway, I’m dyslexic.  Lately, though, I can’t seem to avoid encountering interesting things.  I also can’t seem to avoid writing about them, even if I don’t have the time.
Yesterday afternoon I curled into the corner of my couch and started a difficult letter to a friend–difficult because my friend can read between the lines and know when I’m full of crap. This letter was especially difficult to write because two large bees were distracting me with repeated slamming of their heads into the window behind me.  As an appeasement I wrote a quick poem for them.  It worked, but I still had to finish the letter; and I had yet to face writing about two roast pigs I would meet a few hours later.  Those pigs kept me up until three o’clock in the morning.
I used to make fun of people like me.

The End of May

It’s Saturday.
Mowers hum their lines on lawns while
lilacs swing on strings of tender winds.
Two crazy bumble bees fly their heads
into the window pane like spurned lovers.
They break their wings and drop into the
primrose before falling asleep, hungry,
among golden suites of nectar.

G W Sisk
May 28, 2011

Photography Redeveloped

By Russell Lee.  Reproduction from color slide. LC-USF351-317. LC-DIG-fsac-1a34096. FSA/OWI Collection. Prints and Photographs Division, Library of Congress

Russel Lee: Faro and Doris Caudhill, Homesteaders

My friend, Ed Farnham, sent me a link to an incredible collection of seventy color photographic images taken by american photographers working for the Farm Security Administration and Office of War Information.  The dates of these images range from the late Depression to the middle of World War II.  Thanks, Ed!  I recall seeing these images once before.  But they were mixed with other black and white images of that era.  It wasn’t until I reviewed this specific Kodachrome collection that I began to appreciate the significance of their effect on our generation.

These images help me to understand how the mechanisms that drive our perception of history, along with all its pre-conditioned conceptual and emotional responses, relate closely to how deep beneath our culture’s skin these documents appear to rest.  For example, in western culture we tend to relate qualities of color (even qualities of black and white) in visual media to points on a historical time-line.  We proceed to intuitively calculate the relevance, or lack of relevance, of a medium’s content to the context of our present lives.  As the color in an old photograph shifts and fades, much of its original context, subtext and intent begins a transmogrifying process of bleaching and redevelopment.  The pigment of its original DNA is gradually drawn away, and is often replaced, incrementally, by a sheen of culturally instituted meaning that allows us to proceed with our lives according to our immediate needs.  A faded, seventy-year-old, black and white photograph of a simply dressed homesteading couple is touching, but mostly serves us now by giving us the satisfaction that as time proceeds, our condition succeeds—the opposite of what cultural primitivism would assert as evidence of the inevitable decay of our society.

Ignoring cultural primitivism, most of us make use of a calendar to measure a culture’s forward progress.  So it is shocking to us when that same aged image is presented to us with evidence in full color that blood may still be coursing through the capillaries of this healthy couple’s tanned skin, and that the violent purple storm in the background seems to be passing harmlessly over their crops.  This isn’t just an interesting effect; it’s a potentially destructive effect!  This unexpected shift of the past toward the present could be quite threatening to both ends.  Those harmless clouds are suddenly the same ones that we hope won’t wash away Southern Pakistan this Fall.  At the same time, that quiet bag lady sitting on the curb outside our corner laundromat smoking a broken cigarette may have a story to tell us today that might not be properly interpreted from an archived digital image file viewed seventy years from now.

The candle burns at both ends.  When Rembrandt’s famous painting, ‘Night Watch’ was cleaned properly in 1940, it became the ‘Day Watch’.  And the fiction that time had infused into its darkened varnish dissolved without leaving a salable story in its place.  The painting was clean; but the Old Master’s status was smudged.  And consider how less menial Michelangelo’s personal sins became each time a new panel of the Sistine Chapel was restored during the last twenty-five years.  The newly revealed bright tones and intense colors threatened to insinuate the Renaissance’s timeline on top of our own.  Without cues from smoky hues, this masterpiece needs to work a little harder to compete for attention against fresher, cutting-edge continuous narratives.

The history of photography is relatively compressed.  But we quickly discern changes in its technologies, which we use as guides toward distilling and editing the contents and effects of the medium as it ages.  In the case of war images, Mathew Brady could accomplish more with a found body, in a few seconds, than his contemporary, Vasily Vereshchagin, could convey in his painting of a pile of skulls, produced over several weeks.  Vereshchagin’s work is masterful and important.  But Brady’s photo wins the day with an immediate sense of unaltered verisimilitude that makes no bones about its editorial intent.

Vasily Vereshchagin, Apotheosis of War, 1871 (right)

Mathew Brady: Death of A Sharpshooter / Vasily Vereshchagin: Apotheosis of War

Some of the original impact of Brady’s Civil War photographs has survived.  But our perceptions of imperfections in his era’s lenses and techniques have inured us to their full impact.  We’ve certainty seen work of better technical quality issued during each war that followed.  It seems that each new war’s delivery of images containing ever-higher levels of visceral verisimilitude has a degenerative effect on the power of images from previous conflicts.  At the height of World War II, Life Magazine needed to remove details of maggots on a photograph of a dead US soldier’s body to make it suitable for public consumption.  Years later, when the magazine chose to republish the image, it realized that the maggots needed to properly repopulate the dead body before the photo could carry anywhere near its original impact.  This was the Viet Nam war era, when color photography was making its first impact on printed publications.  Black and white maggots from Iwo Jima had lost their impactful place in history.

Our diet of photography has been prepared, for the most part, by printed media, cinematography and our family camera.  Though color film and processes have been available since the early nineteen hundreds, it was expensive and fussy for amateur photographers, and expensive and impractical to reproduce in printed media and movies.  Television took even longer to accommodate color in their productions.  Most of us who are middle-aged rely only on our memories of color while we pore through photo albums of our childhood.  I know from a black and white photo from my youth that it was my father’s green 1952 Chevy sedan that I was leaning against when I was five years old.  And it looks like I posed for that Brownie snap even longer ago than it feels.

So, the government accountants must have howled until sunup when they received the first bills for purchasing and processing all those rolls and plates of very expensive Kodachrome film.  In the middle of a national financial crisis, it was a mistake as obvious as thousand-dollar toilet seats and crates of gilded goblets.  Without any other comparable, contemporary media context, the color must have seemed garish and absurd—even to some of the photographers who were assigned to use it.  Only a handful of photographers and assignment editors, along with perhaps even fewer astute and dedicated editors and bureaucrats, could envision more than a slim relevance of these color images to their place in history.

Eighty years later, we’re dealing with the same shock.  How can these color images represent a time and status quo that we believe we have since evolved from?  How are our storms less ravaging?  How are our poor less needy?  How are our war-dead less disfigured and bloody?  What is the real shape of industry’s progress?  Old barns still are red.  A girl in a pinafore dress looks the same riding on a buckboard as she does sitting in the back seat of a Mazda.  Some folk still work hard all day; some still don’t work at all.

Unintentionally, perhaps, the mundane is suddenly elevated as art.  Most importantly, the present suddenly owes a larger debt to the past.

Oct. 20, 2010

Perceptions

by Gavin W Sisk

As a species, we make peculiar mistakes in how we perceive the world and ourselves.  In many ways, these mistakes are hard-wired.  It would be cheap to pronounce them only as evolutionary flaws in need of excision.  These cognitive quirks and limitations are what define us as humans.  As Leonard Cohen said, “There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in”.

A More Perfect Union

An Accounting

At “I do”
All hearts for rent.
Each the lord
Of love that’s sent.
Our vows a chit
To lovers lent.
Payable
With bodies spent.

I’ve begun with a poem of mine, which attempts to describe some realities of human relationships.  I wrote it last spring after I came to realize that the concept of perfect commitment might be only a dysfunctional artifact of our cultural evolution.  I have come to believe that a perfect commitment is neither possible nor practical.

We own only our selves.  We thrive only when we accept possession of our selves and defend our selves from those who would otherwise possess us.  But we can own our selves in a manner that is especially relevant and meaningful to others.  And others should own their selves likewise.  Towards the preservation of our species, various combinations and collections of our selves are important and inevitable.  One combination that is particularly important often begins when two individuals discover that there is something especially relevant, meaningful, and even interesting to each other about the selves each of them owns.  These two individuals could inspect each other for further signs of relevance, meaning and interest.  To be useful, that inspection would require that each other’s little hatches and latches be incrementally loosened and unlocked–with the pace of progress controlled biologically by a continuous re-balancing of fear and attraction.  It comes down to sex.

To an anthropologist, it would be our ancestors’ rationalization of this process that helps define a point in our cultural evolution when we diverged from the realm of animals.  And it may have been that rationalization that led to the usurping of biology’s balancing role, thereby changing the function of sex from a pinion into an impediment of the functioning of nature’s machine.

In some ways, our cultural evolution can be seen in terms of a continuous engineering and instituting of artificial systems of emotional and practical checks and balances intended to prevent our selves and this machine from tipping into Hell.  The definition of Hell must be hidden somewhere in our DNA.  None of us has been there.  None of us can agree about what it is.  But we all know that we can’t go there.  To make certain we don’t go there, we strip our selves of personal armor to donate to the casting of ever-more intricate gears and levers to try to keep the machine level.  The process leaves some of us feeling lighter, and others of us feeling exposed.  For the armor we surrender, we substitute agreements.  It comes down to survival.

Ten thousand years from now, an intergalactic anthropologist may be sifting through the rusted debris that is all that remains of our societies.  He might conclude from minimal evidence that institutions, as a primary feature of humans’ invented response to the pressures of their evolution, were singularly responsible for human devolution and extinction.  That would be a safe guess.  What this anthropologist might fail to deduce is that there could never have been enough time to evolve a more complete set of orderly, successful evolutionary responses to the biological pressures implied by the first opposable thumb.

It may be more useful to wonder what mysteriously perfect chain of evolutionary events would have invested early hominids with the capacity to evolve controllably into a species that could face itself, perceive the moments and movements of its universe, carve spears, make deals, organize villages, pledge allegiances, refine cultures, declare a place for heaven and hell, describe perfection, build institutions, negotiate commitments that seem to fly in the face of all that is good in nature, and then give their selves up like ants for the sake of a perfect communion.  What a lucky time and place this is for all of us.  We are the weight of thousands of civilizations perched upon a single pin, balanced by an obligation to a gyroscopic sense of perfection.

But the language we use to define the perfection of this constructed communion is also the language that exposes it to us as a rocking and rolling artifice.  The miracle of our cultural evolution then begins to look like an insidious, autonomous robot.  As its gears and levers crowd closer and squeal louder, we scurry for the escape hatch.  We try to take our selves back.  Like Adam and Eve, we see our nakedness and steal fig leaves to cover our selves up.  We reject the spinning illusion of perfection that supports us, but cannot accept what might be the real measurements of our imperfections.  There are not enough fig leaves.

Cultural primitivism seems to suggest that the crisis is as inevitable as its resolution.  Over time, as we gain knowledge of our predicament, we gain the ability to deal evermore ineffectively with it.  That’s a safe guess.  It at least leaves us hanging from the reins of the robot.  But it doesn’t account for the fact that we’ve been here before.  It says little about the quality of the responses the human species has made over thousands of generations, in the face of immense and varied pressures applied by both nature and culture (as far as we can distinguish the two).  Above all, it does little beyond leading us from one illusion into another.  The machine still spins drunkenly on its pin; we are all still riding upon it.  If we should learn anything useful, it is that we should accept our selves, hold onto the railing, hold onto each other, and not be so distracted by the fictive squeal of that damned robot.

Benjamin Franklin had succinct advice on the practical realities of marriage that would apply to all the perfect commitments we attempt to make–

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half-shut afterwards.”

Oct. 17, 2010

How We Start, Again

I was born, which happens to every animal.  But I was born human.  And what separates us humans from other animals is that we watch the winter bearing down upon us, and then stop to make a note of it.  Some well-provisioned Paleolithic clan, finding themselves with full stomachs and spare time, accepted the imperative to make a note of their precarious life.  They left us the fourteen thousand-year-old paintings in the caves of Lascaux, France.  We’ve been climbing and falling from precipices, and painting and writing about the pain and joy of it, ever since that pre-historic time.

We humans have a unique capacity to feel shockingly lucky to have materialized when we have, inside a human mother’s womb.  What a lucky time and place.  How beautiful we all are.  How God-full are our sunrises.  Yet nearby to each of us are the suffering souls of uncountable humans and other animals, having materialized when they did, inside less lucky wombs.  How God-awful are all those sunsets.  And how grateful the rest of us should feel.  Somehow, though, we find ways to squander our luck.  We fail to accept that our lives are not nearly as complicated as our excuses for not living.

Until recently, I did not appreciate fully my favorite lines from T. S. Elliot’s poem, The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock: “I should have been a pair of ragged claws / Scuttling across the floors of silent seas”.  I’ve always understood the old man’s maudlin complaint as an insincerely constructed lament—a whine-fest with only himself on the guest list.  Now, I have a better idea of what this old man’s blameful situation might mean to us as we age and begin to worry about our misconceptions of life and death.  The issue is not as simple as a mid-life crisis that might be resolved by a new mate and a fast motorcycle.  You might not hear “mermaids singing each to each”.  You might not know what this is, or who is responsible, or where to go next.  But if you sit still and cover yourself in ashes and moan loudly, you’ll incur nobody’s pity but your own.  Then the distain of all who were born in much less lucky wombs will be justified.  Self-pity is like heroin.  It will lull you to sleep while the roads of other lives are laid across your soul.

A man who thinks he knows his thoughts is standing next to a man who knows his own thoughts better.  And neither man may know his own thoughts well enough.  Writing is re-writing.  Re-writing is thinking.  Vision and revision mean coming to grips with what we understand, and what we have misunderstood.  To write, and to re-write, is the opportunity to recover after stumbling.  You learn a little as you fall; you learn much more as you pull yourself back up.  Just as importantly: you may loose your pride on the way down, but you gain your dignity on the way up.


Oct. 16, 2010